She had time, Anna told herself. There was no need to go sneaking around, risk getting caught… Besides, there was something even more embarrassing about the idea of messing her diaper on her own, with no outside help whatsoever. She blushed just imagining it, the mental picture bringing the tingling back, making her shake her head, try to banish it. This wasn’t the time! She was going to go eat in just a few minutes!
“Everything okay?” Karissa smirked, Anna flinching, having nearly forgotten she was still in the room with her.
“Y-Yeah,” Anna nodded quickly. “Just… thinking.”
Karissa nodded, didn’t press any further, thankfully, instead stepping over closer to Anna, adjusting her shirt, unrolling the hem of it so it covered the waistband of her diaper better. “Th-Thanks,” Anna told her, looking nervously at her reflection in the mirror.
“No problem,” Karissa said. “You’re going to have to learn to get better at noticing that… I’m not going to be there at school to help you out.”
Was Karissa judging her? Anna fidgeting, unable to read what, exactly, the girl’s tone meant. Did she think that Anna was that silly and careless, despite supposedly wearing diapers full-time for a while now, or was she starting to suspect? “I-I know,” Anna replied. “I-I just feel so comfortable here, I didn’t think about it.”
Karissa smiled, making Anna feel a little guilty for fibbing to her. “I’m glad,” the bigger girl told her. “This is your room now, and I want you to be at home to do whatever you need or want to do. Just, you know, be careful about when you’re going to be around Dad or Aidan, unless you want them to know about your diapers.”
“I-I don’t!” Anna blurted out, as if Karissa was accusing her of that, rather than warning her about it.
“Okay,” Karissa chuckled, bemused. “Good to know.”
Anna blushed. She didn’t think it was intentional, but being around Karissa always made her feel so small in comparison, so silly, like a little girl so desperate to impress her older sister, yet constantly failing at it.
She also couldn’t help blushing when she faced Mrs. Florez again next, after what she’d done in her diaper. It seemed a bit like a betrayal, given how the woman appeared to think of her as a child, closer to Aidan’s age than Karissa, but that only strengthened her resolve to be sure to poop her pants before bedtime.
Fortunately, it looked like the trip to the zoo had tired everyone out, not just her, making the meal fairly subdued. Anna offered to do the dishes tonight, too, Mrs. Florez telling her no, though Anna could sense some more hesitance this time around.
As much as she didn’t really want to do it, she did feel like it was the least she could do. “I don’t mind,” she said. “I’ve had a little rest, after all… I bet you haven’t.”
“No, I suppose not,” Mrs. Florez admitted. “You don’t have to, though.”
For better or worse, it did make Anna feel a bit more like an adult again, gathering up the dishes to take into the kitchen to get them cleaned up, having some sort of responsibility, for that one night, anyway. Of course, as she reminded herself while the sink ran, that wasn’t necessarily the case… She could look at it as a chore, instead. She wasn’t a grown-up, trying to show her gratitude, she was a child, being taught responsibility.
That became an especially easy narrative to buy into as she got into the task, and her tummy began to rumble. She blushed, wiggling her bottom under her shorts, biting down on her bottom lip. This was it… She had been a tad worried it wouldn’t happen before her bedtime change, but now she was pretty sure she’d be able to pull it off after all.
She pondered, for a moment, if she should do it right now or if she should wait. She was alone for now, yet the kitchen was hardly the most private place in the house, with no door for her to close. And she’d have to come toddling out of there when she was done, try to get elsewhere without Aidan or Mr. Florez seeing – or, more importantly, smelling – her.
On the other hand… She had been doing her best to teach herself to wet her diaper as soon as she felt the need, and this was the natural progression… And she didn’t know with any certainty that she’d have a better opportunity tonight to fill her diaper in peace. She giggled nervously, looking down at herself, barely able to believe what she was thinking, what she was about to do.
She was such a baby… She was supposed to be in here, proving she was a big girl, that she could help Mrs. Florez, and now she was making a big mess in her pants for Mrs. Florez to clean up, negating all that progress, showing just how much of a baby she was deep down…
She felt her knees bending slightly, her thumb threatening to creep into her mouth until she remembered it was covered it soapy water. She chewed harder on her lip instead, feeling a little light-headed as she let out a soft grunt, trying to push.
She was so focused, she didn’t hear the sound of a throat clearing behind her, didn’t recognize that she was no longer alone until Karissa spoke up. “Everything okay?”
Anna gasped, spinning around, cheeks burning. She was so lucky it was Karissa who had showed up, she thought. Maybe Aidan wouldn’t have known what her stance was… Mr. Florez would have, though. Mrs. Florez would have, too, and probably would have whisked her away to the toilet, trying to help. She was a bit surprised Karissa didn’t do the same, but maybe she assumed Anna was too far gone already. Anna wasn’t sure how to respond, what to say, just staring at the other girl in shock, wide-eyed.
“Do you need me to take over while you run to the bathroom?” Karissa inquired.
“I-I’m okay,” Anna blurted out without thinking.
“Are you sure?” Karissa asked, moving in closer, giving the seat of Anna’s diaper a pat while the smaller girl squirmed, confirming that she was still clean. “It’s not too late.”
“I-I can wait,” Anna told her.
Karissa raised an eyebrow skeptically, Anna practically feeling herself shrink as Karissa showed how unlikely she found that, how much she doubted Anna’s ability to get to the potty on time. It was probably particularly embarrassing because Anna knew she wasn’t going to, even if it was on purpose, proving Karissa’s point, as far as Karissa would know.
“I-I can!” Anna insisted, stomping her foot, every protest making her inevitable failure all the more humiliating.
“Why don’t I at least give you a hand?” Karissa compromised. “Then you’ll be done quicker.”
If she did that, Anna wasn’t going to have another chance to try to mess herself here… But Karissa didn’t wait for an answer, sidling in next to her, taking over. It should have been a nice thing, something she was grateful for… Instead, it made her more flustered, working alongside her after being caught like that, feeling her stomach rumbling more and more, hoping that it wasn’t getting loud enough for Karissa to overhear, to wonder why she wasn’t making a dash for the bathroom.
“There we go!” Karissa declared when they were done. “Now, you don’t need my help getting your diaper off, do you?” Anna blushed, shook her head. “Then go on,” she instructed, sending her off with another crinkly pat to the bottom. “You can text me when you’re done if you want, and I can help you get into a fresh one.”
“O-Okay…” Anna agreed, toddling out of the kitchen. She hadn’t thought of that before, she realized, the idea of just saying she’d needed to poop, taking off her own diaper and cleaning herself up… She could do that now, Karissa having basically given her blessing to it. But… Anna had already made up her mind, was already determined to fill her pants.
As embarrassing as the encounter in the kitchen had been, this was better. Karissa probably wasn’t going to be shocked that she hadn’t made it in time, would be somewhat prepared for it… Especially if Anna hinted at it in her text. And Karissa was hopefully going to cover for her with her family when it came to why it was taking so long for her to join them in the living room after finishing the dishes.
She paused at the bathroom door for a moment, wondering if she ought to go do it in there. There was something appealing about the thought of going and sitting on the toilet, but remaining in her diaper, and it might make it easier for her to let go… But then she’d have to get from there to Karissa’s room in a full diaper afterwards. It wasn’t like she needed to flush the toilet to cover for herself; it would be obvious as soon as Karissa saw her that she hadn’t made it.
So she went straight to Karissa’s room instead, heart racing, knowing what she was getting ready to do. After making sure the door was shut, she walked over to her bed, squatting down, pushing, straining… And having no luck. “Come on!” she huffed under her breath, pouting. She knew how good this felt, how delightfully babyish, but all those years of potty training were working against her. Maybe she should have gone into the bathroom after all; she wasn’t about to go back now, however.
Her face lit up, seeing the teddy bear on her bed again, remembering what she’d done with it, how it was the whole reason for this, the whole thing instantly making her feel smaller. She reached over, grabbing it, dragging it off the bed and snuggling it, the size of it in her arms and the shameful memory mixing together, regressing her more and more. It didn’t quite do it, though, wasn’t quite enough…
Until she let go of her teddy with one arm, popping that thumb into her mouth. She peered at her reflection, sliding her already damp thumb free again just long enough to reach down, adjust her t-shirt, doing the opposite of what Karissa had done, pushing it behind the waistband of her diaper.
There she was, in her shorts, clearly padded underneath, in her Velcro sneakers, cuddling a teddy bear for dear life, sucking her thumb… The only thing missing, the only thing that would make her look more like an oversized toddler, was a big, stinky lump in the seat of her pants… And, whether it was that thought, or simply her bowels giving up, recognizing that she did, in fact, want to do this, no matter how hard her instincts were trying to stop her, she finally felt herself start to do it.
Her knees bent down further as she let out a tiny grunt, sucking harder on her thumb as a warm, mushy lump began to form in her diaper. Automatically, her body attempted to stop it, knowing that this was wrong, that she wasn’t supposed to be doing this, but she forced her way through, keeping up the pressure, feeling the mass slowly growing, spreading. It was a different experience than last night with the suppositories, far more intentional, rather than, in the end, feeling like an accident because she couldn’t hold it any longer. It was difficult to say, in the moment, which was more infantile, more embarrassing, although she certainly didn’t feel like an adult right now.
Which made it very complicated when the bedroom door swung open on her. She let out a gasp, struggling to stop herself, to stand up straight and pretend nothing was wrong, to even remove her thumb from her mouth again, but she was too far gone now, unable to do any of it, or anything at all other than continue to poop her pants and watch, mortified, as Karissa stepped in, saw her.
“What’s going on?” Karissa raised an eyebrow.
“Y-You said…” Anna grunted, groaning as she felt her diaper swell a bit more, the next wave starting.
“I remembered that you forgot to pick up your phone,” Karissa nodded over towards Anna’s bedside table. Anna followed her gaze, blushing; it was true, she’d been so flustered when she was getting ready, she hadn’t even thought about grabbing it. “So I thought it would be easiest for me to come in and be waiting for you. I didn’t expect to walk in on…”
“I-I couldn’t make it,” Anna lied, knowing, as she said it, that it probably wasn’t going to work.
“Really?” Karissa crossed her arms. “Did you try? Why are you in here, then, and not the bathroom? Why didn’t you go earlier when I asked if you needed to? Why are you sucking your thumb?”
The babyish mindset that had made it possible for her to mess her diaper was working against her now, making it difficult for her to stop the tears welling up in her eyes at the onslaught of questions, at the realization that she’d made a silly mistake, that now she’d been caught, brown-bottomed. Karissa had given her every opportunity to make it to the bathroom, and she’d turned her down, and she wasn’t sure there’s really been enough time for her to be able to believably claim she’d made any attempt to get to the toilet.
Maybe, she thought frantically, she could tell Karissa that she was fully incontinent after all, that she’d been so embarrassed about it that she’d claimed it was just her bladder… She did now know that she enjoyed messing, so she wouldn’t exactly mind having to do it in her diaper all the time… Was Karissa going to buy that, though?
Or perhaps she should tell Karissa that, even though she could control her bowels, she’d learned that she kind of liked going in her diapers. It might be a good stepping stone to eventually confess the whole thing to her, to test the waters… It was kind of a big first step, however, a big leap to hope that Karissa wouldn’t be weirded out by it. Or… Should she go all the way now, tear off the Band-Aid immediately? Karissa might suspect anyway, if Anna failed to be convincing enough with whatever else she said.
She wasn’t certain what the right choice was, but she knew she had to say something, and quick, the longer she waited the more fake any lie or partial truth she told might sound. She gulped, nursing her thumb anxiously, staring up at Karissa, praying she wasn’t about to make a big mistake.
Should Anna say…
…”I just wasn’t able to make it to the toilet, okay? It was an accident! It won’t happen again, I promise!”
…”I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before, but I actually have to use my diapers for everything.”
…”To be honest, I didn’t want to get to the toilet. I kind of like how it feels to mess my diaper.”
…Or, “You might want to sit down, because I have a lot of explaining to do…”
This decision has already been made, but if you’d like to catch up on the story, and help decide where it goes next, you can find it, and other exclusive stories and captions, at my Patreon!
The Princess's Castle 